What is the human connection?
My professor and I are writing a book on connectedness. We’re doing research to figure out what it really is, what it means to other people (locally and globally) and what experiences people have that are commonalities through-out a global setting.
For me, I have always struggled with having a connection to my family. Yes, I have a lovely family and yes, we have been close at times, but what is it really? As I get older and find out more about myself, I have begun to stray from certain people in my family and also be drawn closer to others. For instance, certain people can’t seem to understand why I do the things I do or why I question certain actions that they show. The answer to this, I don’t know. So, I ask questions. I am always in search for a deeper meaning.
My life, since a young child, has revolved around questions. I have always found myself asking questions like what caused that person to react that way or how could I have changed the situation by my own actions? What do people feel when they are in a comfortable setting with people they love versus by themselves in a totally new world (i.e. traveling somewhere far from home alone)? How do these things shape our reality and what do we choose to do with that reality? Why is our world the way it is and why do people treat our earth like a disposable paper plate?
These are just a few of the constant questions I ask but lately, my most intriguing questions have been about connectedness. How do we let the connections we have with friends, family, sometimes even strangers, change or shape our lives? What do we do with it? How can we better ourselves from those connections? Something I taught myself at a very young age was to not ask one question in particular: why? But rather, ask how? How can we use these things to improve? How can we find an answer? To me, asking how leaves room for improvement whereas asking why seems to be more past driven. For instance, why would that person do that? Or why did I have to go through these things? Asking how has always left me with more questions, which for a person like me, intrigues me even more.
As I’m sure many of you have gathered from my previous postings, I seem to focus a lot on the connection with the self and what that really means. In honesty, I probably would not have the connection I do with myself if I hadn’t had the connection with my community. Growing up I was often alone and had no one to fall on but my friends. My friends became my family. My friends’ families became my own family and honestly, without those people in my life, I am not really sure where I would be today.
I think that it was those relationships that really helped me see this beautiful person I had hiding underneath all the pain. I was able to really listen. I was able to see what they saw in me. My new families helped me experience the connection of love. They loved me. Regardless of the things I had been through or maybe had once done to others, they loved me. And without that experience of love, I would not have been able to see the love for myself. Those people helped me embrace my odd qualities and helped me see that all my differences were actually strengths. They helped me see the beauty in myself rather than the hatred that was instilled by my childhood.
To this day, certain people that should have my back still try to show that those qualities are negative and it is during those times that I have to take the love and connection that I have with myself and fight back. Not literally fight, but fight to see the love within myself. It helps me understand that no matter what those people think, I am only that if I, myself, believe it.
So, this is where you all come in. I am really curious, what is your experience? How have connections with others (your community, partner, family, friends, etc.) shaped your life? What about the connection you have with yourself? What about with the unknown (God, the Universe, Supernatural, whatever unknown force drives your life, etc.)?
Right now, I am collecting research from people all over the world on what connectedness is to them. So, if you find this intriguing and would like to be part of it, please send me an email, video with your answers, or comment on this blog post, however you feel most comfortable. If you would like to send via email please send it to email@example.com.
Here’s a bit more information on our book:
The basic idea of the book is to take three questions – What is human connection? What is connection to the self? And what is connection to the unknown? – and look deeper into how each type of connection enhances or disenhances our lives. My theory is that through community and the connection one has to other people in their surrounding lives, they are able to see and learn things about themselves that they may have missed when not connected to other people. This then helps strengthen the connection to the self and so forth, the connection to a higher being, God, Supernatural, Universe, etc.
My research for the book is going to be looking into the similarities and differences of people’s experiences with the human connection and how it has helped transform their lives. Think about it, when you were a child, without the physical human connection with your mother you would have grown up much much differently. Human connection helps us transform our lives, maybe even without knowing it but it is crucial in the development of our connections to the self and to God (or whoever that may be in your life).
Feel free to write about anything you think would fit with this. It can be your own experiences with the connection or lack of connection. You can focus it on your connection to the unknown (God, Universe, etc.). Or focus it on yourself. What connection brings the most for you in your life and how have you let it or helped it transform your life for the better or worse? It is really up to you which direction to go. Also, please write your full name, age, and possible job/career (optional) if you would like to be directly quoted.